Thoughts on the Feast of St. Joseph (Observed)

I was able to get to Mass this morning in honor of the feast of St. Joseph, one of my dh's patrons, as Joseph is his middle name. As my thoughts bounced off today's homily, I heard again such a strong echo of the truth I have heard from Fr. Giussani. I wish I could refer to the priest by name, but I didn't recognize him. But he discussed the question of why St. Joseph was named patron of the universal Church. Does it not make clear sense that if St. Joseph was the guardian of Christ the Redeemer, then he is also the patron of the Church, which is Christ's redeeming presence in time and space? This patronage was only declared in 1870, making it a rather new development. I thought of St. Paul and Jesus' revelation to Him that brought about his conversion: "Saul, Saul, why do you persecute Me?" Saul was of course persecuting the Church, and Jesus identifies completely, personally, with the Church. I am not such an expert on all the writings of Fr. Giussani to be able to quote extensive passages from him, but I know that he labored to make people see this truth in everyday life: I am to live this reality that our lives (Jesus' and mine, and ours in the Church) are so intimately bound that even to say that Jesus is "close" to me is to get Him too far away.

When I first encountered CL I felt as if there were a certain "music" that played, but only when I assumed a certain posture, so to speak. I don't know how else to put it but in these figurative terms. That music told me of my own call, my dignity, a call to unity with others given to following Christ in this way, for the good of the whole world. Today I heard the "music" again, but in a different way. What I heard is that many Catholics (and others) do not live as if called personally to be Christ in this world. I heard that many are somehow stuck at playing a role in the Church. Playing a role means seeing Christian life as a human endeavor that I manage, in which I succeed or fail. It is having religious practices, a set of beliefs. It is, I believe, the origin of the pigeonholes of "liberal" and "conservative" Catholics (terms I loathe). Some choose to love and follow the human Christ, some choose to love and follow the divine Christ. Both have it right, and both have it wrong.

To follow Christ requires all of me given to all of Him; me, aware of my need, radically aware of my human limitations. To follow Christ does not require me to be perfect, but involves me adhering to Him because of the sheer weight of the attraction He is to my soul. He knows who I am, for He created me, He creates me. He asks of me nothing that is not possible as long as I cling to Him, drawing life from Him, returning always to Him. In love, He draws me to Himself. He does not send me out, awaiting such a time as I re-make myself into something acceptable -- this is absurd and impossible.

What is this music I hear? I think it is the music of the Lover serenading His beloved. Speaking for myself, I know that for many years the words "God loves you" spoken to me or "God loves me" spoken by myself packed as much punch as "Hi, how are you" spoken to an acquaintance passed in a busy hallway. Oh, for the living vigor of these words to break upon us! It must require.... real living human beings who are transformed by it to bear witness to it!

This is the missionary call that attracted me as a Lutheran child, as a charismatic young adult, as a new Catholic. But I always thought it required some institutional reality, being sent to a foreign country, or, on the other hand, boiled down to being nice and muddling through being a Christian as best as one could. I have probably been told a thousand times that Christ wants each of us to live His life wherever we are, and whatever we do, and in this way we make His kingdom come.

Maybe I just needed to hear the music to go with those words.