Because I Can't Go to School of Community Tomorrow

I thought I would redeem my missing SoC tomorrow morning (due to VBS) by giving some focused attention to the text tonight.

Thoughts from page 54 and following of Is It Possible to Live This Way?

"Faith is recognizing that God made flesh is present in the world, in the history of the world."

As my fraters pointed out to me in our last Fraternity meeting, I do actually get this point. I see, in fact, that by this definition, Christian faith is my normal framework for seeing the world. The funny thing is that I haven't tried to produce this nor have I always noticed it. It truly is organic growth that God has brought about in me, just as James says of the farmer's crop.

"To the simple, you can reveal yourself."

How I have experienced this this week. Some of the very little children have told me "I like how you play guitar" or "you sing nice" or even "I like the way your hair looks." I was able to authentically and naturally say "Thank you!" to each of these statements. If an adult were to say these things, I'd say thank you, but with some degree of guardedness, or even downright suspicion. Or blushing. Something that betrays a difficulty in revealing myself. The simplicity of a child is a beautiful thing that somehow draws beauty from me. I'm thinking of the types of magic tricks where someone pulls flowers out of an empty vase or a quarter out of someone's ear.

"How does faith come about naturally? ... It wouldn't be human if it came without reason."

Another experience of today: As a time-filler, one very devoted woman brought a quiz book of "Catholic questions" to spring on the kids. I heard her use four of them. For two of these, she herself did not know the right answer and had to double-check the child's response. In discussion of a third, she led all of the kids in mispronouncing a liturgical object. A fourth gave three multiple choice options to the question "What does the phrase 'thy kingdom come' mean?"

I greatly admire this woman's resourcefulness in trying to interact with the kids while their leaders went through the attendance task. But I just hate this methodology for presenting any body of knowledge, especially when it might be confused with "faith formation." Particularly when one tries to summarize "the meaning" of some Scriptural reality in ten words or less.

I distinctly remember a sense of depression when I was 14 years old and a recently confirmed Lutheran. I knew everything. There was nothing more of God for me to learn -- or at least that was the message I got. We had an intense exposure to Lutheran doctrine in confirmation class, and even did public examination where we stood before the congregation during the service and the pastor quizzed us for a half hour! But then, it was over. My whole sense of religious learning -- including Scripture memorization -- became a big deception to me. It was all within my power. None of it was fueled from an encounter with Christ, or at least it was not explained, made reasonable to me, that way.

Come to think of it, this takes me back to my first point. I've really needed to give up spiritual formation as my own project, and simply accept that I am soil, and God's seed is planted in me, and grows with my Father himself as the Gardener. My attention needs to be on keeping that soil free from rocks and brambles. Many years ago in meditating on the parable of the sower, I came up with this phrase or course of action: think, wait, and meditate. That's my job. I could translate that phrase thusly: be rationally open to the world around me (think -- don't be hard of heart). Accept my limitations and endure suffering (wait -- don't be shallow). Abide in the presence of Jesus daily (meditate -- the 100 fold, now.)