He's Learning, Too

Here's an episode from today. I don't know if this indicates a huge paradigm shift on my part, or if it just shows how dense I'm capable of being!

I was making dinner, and my son's friend came down to the kitchen looking serious and told me that he had hit her. I'm developing this mode where I figure if I just say some small thing, the child at hand will run with the next stage of things. So I gave a very serious look back and asked her how she felt like dealing with it. She commented that she didn't know, and turned and went out the door.

Moments later, my son came downstairs. He explained his own upset. She insisted on calling him One-X, but he didn't want to be called that, and it was making him really mad, and she wouldn't stop and she hurt him so he hurt her. My sweet boy is always honest.

He emphasized the part about being really mad. I asked him what would be a good way of handling it when he was really mad. He said he could shut the door and be alone, which I affirmed and added to a bit, and pointed out that his friend had already left. A moment later, he was outside after her, because he really doesn't like to be alone all that long. I stopped him to also remind him that hitting is not a good way to handle being really mad.

The whole incident was smoothed over and they were back playing together within another 60 seconds or so.

And as he went out, I was thinking about my previous post, on the nature of parental authority. And I thought to myself "Hmm. Well, I'm not the only one who's trying to learn about how to interact with others."

And then I thought -- wait a second! I'm the Mommy; he's the little boy. Of COURSE he's learning about how to interact! For a minute I thought I was the only one for whom getting along with others is sometimes tricky.

Isn't this the sort of thing that Familiaris Consortio talks about in terms of all of the family evangelizing each other? I help him, actively, try to handle his emotions in constructive ways, and he helps me, passively, for now at least, grow in virtue by requiring it of me!

Which reminds me of something else I wanted to blog....